Postpartum support is a birthright

One of the things I found most overwhelming about preparing for Baby Lulu, was that the resources available were effectively infinite. There is a never ending list of books, blog posts, articles, and advice about every single possible topic related to pregnancy, birth, and having children. In these posts, I do my best to not just repeat what I learned in the past few years by reading the same articles or books you’re probably reading now.

I will breeze through the context of how different birth is now than ever before in our species history. Up until the past few hundred years, birth happened in a community. And by birth, I mean pregnancy, labor, delivery and postpartum recovery. All of those things happened in a network of families, women, and elders who guided the new mother through these stages. Postpartum was an especially supported time, where we can see across cultures that there is a near universal tradition of surrounding a new mother for 4-8 weeks with emotional, physical and practical support to allow her to focus on her new baby, and healing her depleted body. But now that level of support is rare, because of spread out families, professional and work expectations, a culture of independence, and a missing governmental support. (Ok that was a little long, but I just covered four books worth of material.)

But it wasn’t until after my own postpartum experience, as I began to prepare to become a postpartum doula, that it actually hit me: I spent nine months surrendering my body’s needs to growing a child. Then I used every last ounce of mental, emotional, and physical strength to bring her into the world.

Never, in the history of time, has it been expected that I could recover from that on my own, especially while providing for my newborn. I was never meant to experience postpartum on my own.

Let this sink in for a minute…

You are not meant to experience postpartum on your own.

We know our culture doesn’t provide this support automatically anymore, and getting it requires available family, friends, or resources to build a sustaining system around us. Not every birthing person has access to this…but every birthing person deserves it.

Getting postpartum support, whether it be from loved ones or professionals, is not an extra set of hands to make up for shortcomings. It’s not admitting some marginal defeat and asking for help. It is acknowledging that we now have to plan for ourselves, what our community used to plan for us. It’s giving ourselves the gift of soul-care.

You deserve to be surrounded by people who allow you to focus on your baby and your recovery.

-Laney